Photo Challenges: Name That Everything

Green things that don’t also find their way on your plate or in a can aren’t such a common sight around these parts.  Nor are their four-season coming of age pals that lose their luster in the colder months.

With that in mind, I’d like to open the floor (or blog) to this photo, taken in Sakura, Chiba, Japan during one of the recent Marches.  Sometimes when I glance at it, I want to eat a slice of pizza, full of  freshly canned vegetables and twigs.  No, just vegetables.  Other times I haven’t a clue as to what angle I took this from, or the height of the plants, or why I was walking around someplace where the color green was prominent.

So, bento-builders, please share your thoughts as to what was going on when this photo was taken.  Bonus points if you provide a link for where you think the setting was/is.
If you like the picture, it would be nice to hear/see that too.

Airline (Route) Map Oddities 2: I’ve Never Been to West Africa

As seen in my first post about airline route maps, Japan has no friends and Hawaii is the latest colony of New Zealand.  I wish I had more of that juicy stuff for you now, so I’ll have to hold off until South Carolina secedes from the union again or for when Zambia becomes the 35th province of China.

Speaking of which, there’s not enough of anything from Africa around these parts.  And…it will stay that way for the time being.  But even though Thai Airways only flies to one city in Africa, Johannesburg, they had the nerve to suggest we were heading for Ghana.  We being the passengers of TG628 from Bangkok to Hong Kong.  Though, if that were true, I’d be gung-ho about trying some peanut butter soup.

If the Shoe Doesn’t Fit it Must be a Dud

Is shopping a priority on your travels?  Don’t have a problem wearing shirts half your size made just down the street from where you bought them?  I used to think that one of the luggage stores at the main Shenzhen, China train station was selling suitcases back to the lumbering tourists from whom they were robbed.  Too forthcoming for a blog post?  Could be.  By the way, if you see a navy blue one in mint condition, it’s not mine, so why not help a brother out…

Speaking of China, it’s a cinch finding a place to buy clothes- listen for monotonous clapping and the occasional banshee shriek.   Though I’m not always in the market for t-shirts even Japanese animators would be disturbed by, so name shopping becomes a tolerable lazy day activity.  What’s that?  It’s when an entrepreneur who majored in Engrish had a bit too much leeway in naming his or her store, and as a result, gives otherwise bored English-proficient visitors a possible half-chuckle.  Or more?  Let’s have you be the judge:

Classic.  Fashionable.  Wool.  JACKVIS.  Slim chance it’s the owner’s first name, even slimmer chance that you’d take this sentence seriously.

Midriffs A Go-Go.  You may have also noticed its neighbor to the right “Guphot.”  I wish that was another name, alas the Chinese translates to photography.  Ha!  Think I didn’t see the “o” perched behind the tree?  +1 for you.

It’s quite simple selling clothes to mannequins.  Living, breathing shoppers, not so much.

My ears are burning.

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Would you boastfully wear Highland Dud hats with your JNCO jeans? 

Collateral Lettuce, My New Food Blog

Compliments of the Season, everyone

I’d like you all to know that I recently started http://collaterallettuce.com/, because I like eating.   I should probably like knowing exactly what I’m eating more, but if I started asking street vendors questions that go beyond the usual “no ice” and “seriously, no ice,” a new hobby might need to be found.  Unusual beverages will be thrown in the mix too– ever try to drink a bird’s nest?– after all, what complements a dinner of horse and daffodil better than pineapple juice?  PLENTY OF THINGS.  Equally important, BuildingMyBento will carry on with the non-edible aspects of travel, so please stay tuned.

Thanks in advance for your questions, comments, and for those of you already with full stomachs, thanks for your subdued excitement.

For Best Results, Stay Indoors

Without a doubt, cruelty.  The silhouette of a woman placing an (her?) umbrella in a shredder- it’s even shed a bead of sweat.

Although that may have been the subject of a recent dream, the truth is much less malicious.  This device, called a “Raincut,” was located by one of the entrances of the Kaikyou Yume Tower (海峡ゆめタワー), the tallest building in Shimonoseki, Japan.  I removed the lid (it came with a lightweight lid) to show that it looks more like an apparatus to create an ehem, conical pizza bagel than one adept at ridding umbrellas of raindrops.  I didn’t mention the word dry, though the Japanese instructions read as follows:

1. Open the umbrella (傘 kasa) and lightly insert/push it (into the hole).  -Already I have my misgivings-
2. When the green light turns off, remove the umbrella.
3. This machine is a dryer (it removes water), but it’s not a dryer (as in, where you’d place wet clothes/money/marbles).

I never seem to have carry an umbrella with me in Japan (instead, I find cardboard boxes or real estate magazines) so I couldn’t try it out, lawfully, but I noticed that it just spins- what did you expect?- might it be as useless as the plastic bags commonly found in Japanese lobbies?  If it’s still raining when you leave, either your umbrella will return to being a victim of rainy weather, or you’ll have a wet plastic bag with you for a long time (no kidding), because rubbish bins in Japan have the same rate of natural increase as the population they serve.  They are both nice thoughts though, to try and avoid turning buildings into water parks.  Moreover, would you be embarrassed to test out a Raincut?  Part of me reckons it’s claptrap, merely another addition to the long list of impractically useful inventions called chindogu.  What do you all in the audience think?

3050 Meters or 10000 Feet, I Still Prefer an Aisle Seat

There doesn’t seem to be any good seat in economy class.  Window seats force you to play Twister in case you need to get up for anything; aisle seats mean bags may fall on you whenever the overhead is opened, someone is going to impel you to stand in the aisle once everyone can disembark, your elbow becomes a bullseye for drink carts, and sometimes a giant metal box is under the seat in front of you; a middle seat has none of those issues, phew, except good luck trying to free a limb to do anything.  Not to mention, don’t you get such a kick out of when the check-in agent says the flight is “very, VERY full,” “completely full” or the ingeniously crafted “full,” only to realize that there are seats still unoccupied, while “the baby” is already happily chewing at your armrest?  Oh, then move to the permanently dour country of Malaysia if it’s such a big deal.

Hey now, then why do I always choose an aisle seat, given the non-exhaustive list of negatives above?  I like wandering about, hitting up the galley where frozen apples and bananas are available to all, sometimes chatting with flight attendants (who are also often frozen) and joining in the elderly Japanese folks who always manage to establish a pop-up gymnasium in the back.  Also, bowing to slight irony, using my knowledge of geography (…and with some assistance from the in-flight map, if available), I’d trek to one of the emergency exit doors to peer out the window.  Why not just choose a window seat then?  I’d make enemies for life with my restless legs and prevailing Middle Eastern countenance.

Just like non-smoking rooms at a Chinese hotel couldn’t be further from the truth, you don’t always have a choice in where you sit on a plane.  Thus, here are two pictures to make the case for you to stay in your allotted window seat, not simply for the fact that the flight is  full (this time, really, truly full), but also because I still want an aisle seat:

United Airlines (NRT-HKG)- Mt. Fuji

Air Dolomiti (CTA-MUC)- Catania & Mt. Etna

Oh, let’s not forget, if you’re seated at the window, you get to use your whole noggin to peer out, so that no one else has a chance of seeing anything.  Never mind that merely sitting still will get you nearly the same view…

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Where do YOU like to sit?

Checking In and Putting Out: Shenzhen’s Conception Hotel

Normally, I’d come to this neighborhood to get street kebabs, apples and qiegao.  That’s all good and well, and mostly harmless (except maybe towards my digestive system), but when I’m not at home, I tend to look up.  That’s when some of the worry sets in.  Random sparks raining down from construction sites (or tedium), sunsets “made” more seductive due to the wonderment of pollution, dripping socks, smocks and mukluks, and blunt-force family planning centers (aka hotels).

Although the Conception Hotel (in that location, for that matter) doesn’t exist anymore, the name inevitably caught my attention, which inevitably also caused me to hyperventilate.  Been to Southern California lately?  Same idea, ya reckon?  Wait a sec, is there any less of a patriotic move, particularly for the countries currently involved? Anyway, in the Shenzhen example, it’s likely just someone having a bit too much fun with English.  Or copious amounts of the local tipple.  Now that I think about it, many of the budget motels in China (宾馆 binguan) have for sale “man/woman oil,” in addition to the towels that require hydration to fully form and concrete slabs price-sensitive Westerners should come to accept as mattresses.

China, if you’re looking for help with translating signs that can (nay, will) be seen by hordes of people, Chinese or not, I’m glad to lend a hand.  I’d start by looking for a hospitality group to recycle the above name.

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Think you’d stay here for a night?  Nine months?  Have you ever seen such an appropriately titled building?